Professional writer for Uproxx.com, GammaSquad.com, Guyspeak.com, Guyism.com, Zug.com, and innumerable other sites. He writes the Internet, basically.
Drug Courier Loses $20,000, Asks Tucson Police For Excuse Note
Granted, losing $20,000 of a drug cartel's money is fairly panic inducing. That said, you do have to wonder what Demarco Alonzo Thomas was thinking when he called the police for a note excusing him from delivering $20,000.
Meet the Girl Who Has to Drink Six Pints of Milk a Day Just to Survive
Do you like milk? Like, do you really like milk? Holly Lindley, a British nine-year-old, really likes milk. Good thing too, because she's got to drink six pints of it a day to survive.