News Radio 710 KEEL logo
Get our free mobile app

I'd be able to turn a regular glass of ice tea into the southern sweet classic with the blink of an eye if I was granted southern superhero powers!

When you think about it, a southern superhero would have to have unique powers that wouldn't be appreciated anywhere else. Let's face it, we march to the beat of a different drummer down here, but I wouldn't change a thing... even if that means that we have to claim Jimbo and his overalls with hidden pockets and contraptions that make him a combination of Mr. Gadget and Batman!

I first started thinking about this when I saw the topic come up on the It's a Southern Thing Facebook page. Their followers had some great ideas, but what did they miss?

A southern superhero can:

Charles Roper
Faster than a speeding swamp boat. More powerful than a tornado. Able to open doors for ladies in a single boot scoot. It's a dually. It's a tractor. It's Southern Man!

Jessica Clarke
The ability to hold their OWN beer as they do something stupid.

Nancy Teller Denton
During the day, mild-mannered James Robert Jones, live bait salesman. But after eating a moon pie and washing it down with an RC Cola, he is transformed into Super Bubba. Faster than the crowd storming The Walmart on Black Friday, Stronger than 3-day old roadkill, and able to leap a 4 car crash at Talledega in a single bound.

Kim Routh
Fix a casserole at the speed of light! Enough to feed an army in the bat of an eye. Because gracious hospitality is everything...

Diana Clark
It’s Four-Wheel Man! Faster than AAA! More power than an ice storm! Able to leap large mud holes in a single thunderstorm! (And if he can’t help you, there is his partner Winch Man!!

Andrea M Jarvis
Greatest Southern Superpower... Granny's ability to turn a potato into Sunday dinner.

Sharon Mitchell Lefante
The ability to jerk a knot in you and make it look like an accident!

Randy C. Lindsey
Defender of the weak, protector of manners, and able to change a tractor tire while quoting Shakespeare.

David Edgar
The ability to actually get out of the house and leave in less than 30 minutes after the goodbyes start.

Angie R Hollifield
The ability to have Alexa understand what we say the first time.

Suzanne Smalling Edler
A fellow employee who was from New York came out of our boss’s office shaking his head. “She just chewed me out and I *thanked* her afterward.”

Geek'd Con Lineup 2021: August 13th-15th

After a year off, Geek'd Con is back and we have an amazing lineup! Here's our guest line up for this year's show. If you want to go, you can buy your tickets here.

Read More: 10 Commandments of Southern Cooking

Read More: 7 Most Haunted Locations in Shreveport-Bossier

More From News Radio 710 KEEL