What Would Be Your Southern Superhero Superpower?
I'd be able to turn a regular glass of ice tea into the southern sweet classic with the blink of an eye if I was granted southern superhero powers!
When you think about it, a southern superhero would have to have unique powers that wouldn't be appreciated anywhere else. Let's face it, we march to the beat of a different drummer down here, but I wouldn't change a thing... even if that means that we have to claim Jimbo and his overalls with hidden pockets and contraptions that make him a combination of Mr. Gadget and Batman!
I first started thinking about this when I saw the topic come up on the It's a Southern Thing Facebook page. Their followers had some great ideas, but what did they miss?
A southern superhero can:
Faster than a speeding swamp boat. More powerful than a tornado. Able to open doors for ladies in a single boot scoot. It's a dually. It's a tractor. It's Southern Man!
The ability to hold their OWN beer as they do something stupid.
Nancy Teller Denton
During the day, mild-mannered James Robert Jones, live bait salesman. But after eating a moon pie and washing it down with an RC Cola, he is transformed into Super Bubba. Faster than the crowd storming The Walmart on Black Friday, Stronger than 3-day old roadkill, and able to leap a 4 car crash at Talledega in a single bound.
Fix a casserole at the speed of light! Enough to feed an army in the bat of an eye. Because gracious hospitality is everything...
It’s Four-Wheel Man! Faster than AAA! More power than an ice storm! Able to leap large mud holes in a single thunderstorm! (And if he can’t help you, there is his partner Winch Man!!
Andrea M Jarvis
Greatest Southern Superpower... Granny's ability to turn a potato into Sunday dinner.
Sharon Mitchell Lefante
The ability to jerk a knot in you and make it look like an accident!
Randy C. Lindsey
Defender of the weak, protector of manners, and able to change a tractor tire while quoting Shakespeare.
The ability to actually get out of the house and leave in less than 30 minutes after the goodbyes start.
Angie R Hollifield
The ability to have Alexa understand what we say the first time.
Suzanne Smalling Edler
A fellow employee who was from New York came out of our boss’s office shaking his head. “She just chewed me out and I *thanked* her afterward.”