Do You Think it’s Possible to be True Friends with Your Ex?
A lot of people think it's not possible for men and women to have a platonic friendship... but what about being friends with an ex? Is that taking things too far?
A recent study says that 54% of people are able to remain friends with an ex after a breakup, including 17% who say they're still friends with all their exes.
Say what? Maybe we're messy here in Shreveport-Bossier City, but I know people who will hide or cross the street if they see their ex. According to YouGov.com, staying friends with an ex is more common than you might think. But what about your new significant other, if you have one? Do they get a say in the situation? Would be jealous if your significant other was friends with someone from their past? I have so many questions!
I'm friends with quite a few of my past boyfriends. I think they're great people or I wouldn't have dated them in the first place. However, even though we're 'friendly,' I wouldn't call myself friends with my ex-husband. Maybe it's because there was never any real emotional resolution on my part. In short, I think men and women can be friends, and I also think you can be friends with an ex, but how you broke up really determines what that looks like moving forward. On the flip side, if there are any residual feelings, I don't think it's fair for someone to maintain a relationship with an ex if they're dating someone new and trying to move on. It's just plain MESSY!
With all of that being said, I decided to unscientifically poll some of my Shreveport-Bossier friends via social media, and here are some of my favorite responses! Apparently, we're a lot more emotionally mature in our area than I was giving us credit for!
I’m still friends with most of mine. The wife has become friends with a few as well.
It depends on the people involved. If you disintegrate with drama, there will most likely be no remaining friendship; however, if it just doesn’t work out and people part on good terms, friendships are still possible.
Yep!! You sure can be. I've remained friends with one of the best men I ever dated, for 30 years and now we are all very much family. He just got married and I welcomed his new wife to the family, etc. BUT....it has taken work, talking through the past, forgiveness on both sides, and maturity. Some of those conversations were not easy. I'm so grateful we are still "family" bc it enriches us all.
Yes. Not all breakups are toxic. Some people recognize that the relationship just isn't the one and move forward. Doesn't mean either party is bad people, which I think is a misconception. Not every relationship needs a villain.
Now, of course, you have to be careful how you handle that friendship in a future romantic relationship.
Yes, it is definitely possible if the relationship ends on decent terms. But it does also depend on the ones involved. Sometimes new spouses etc get in the way because of jealousy etc. But it’s definitely not wrong to be friends with an ex.
I’m friends with my exes. I’m also very close to men whom I call best friends. Never had any relations beyond friendship. It’s possible.
I have men friends, wouldn’t date them, but still care about them. Ex, no way, nope, nada, not gonna happen.
Maggie D. Gilcrease
Depends on which ex. There are a couple who just don’t exist to me anymore. Byeeeeee!
Yes... you can be best friends! If you want to be friends with a crazy person.
Keep your friends close and your enemies closer! Does that answer the question?!
What do you think? Can men and women truly be friends and further, can you be friends with an ex? Inquiring minds want to know!